Urban Crag

Team Insanity’s Kokoda Challenge



Well after months of training the big weekend has finally come and gone.  I’m a little surprised that I’m in a state of mind that allows me to even write this only one day after the event, but I guess I’m just riding the high of not just completing the challenge, but doing it with the whole team in tact!  Even though that gives away the ending, it’s just hard not to say "WE DID IT" as soon as I start talking about it.



For those who don’t know, or haven’t bothered to read our training blog so far, Team Insanity is:

• Nicole Keegan (our mostly fearless team leader with year of experience in Kokoda Challenging)
  
  

• Shane Hollaway (me – for those wondering whose waffle they were reading)
  
  

• Brock Janiczak (bears the burden of carrying our team surplus of insanity)
  
  

• Wayne Van Eyk (our "thank god it’s not raining again" guru of wet weather Kokoda Challenges)
  
  

Before we get in the gritty details, we can’t go any further without taking our hats of to our wonderful support crew.  They happily jumped at our every request for food, drinks and clothes … makes you realise why slavery was so popular.  Who were these incredible people?

• Dennis Mellican (designed our team logo and kindly hosted Team Insanity on the Urban Crag web site)
• Jenesse Valentine (our queen of the camp stove … coffee or milo – she can make them both!)
  
  
• Matthew Moores (always ready with a witty remark or a chuckle … regardless of how bad our jokes were)
  
  

Checkpoint Zero – Stupid O’clock Rides Again



The day began bright and early for all concerned, well it was still dark, but it was definitely early.  The support crew collected those officially insane enough to compete and by 4:30am we were all standing around dumbly watching the support crew attempt to pack all our bags into the Tarago and still leave enough room for the rest of us.  Shortly after, with bag under feet, between feet and on laps, we were on our way to Mudgeeraba. 



We arrived in Mudgeeraba at 5:30am to discover hundreds of other crazy people already milling around the car park.  Team Insanity wandered off to check in and were given their race numbers and timing chips.  After confirming we all had the right numbers (ask Dennis & Jenesse how they "finished" last year), we headed back to the support crew. After grabbing our gear we found a friendly little coffee shop for pre-race coffees.  Fortunately the car wasn’t too far away as Shane had forgotten his hiking poles, and Wayne had left his sunnies in the car.  With all our gear ready to go we headed for the starting line. 



We found our spot on the starting line amongst all the other teams attempting to finish between 20 and 24 hours.  After a few inaudible speeches and the last post, gun shots rang out and the ultra crazy under 20 hours teams took off.  It didn’t take long for another minute to tick by and at 7:01 we were off…





Section One – This is easy

Mudgeeraba to Hardys Road

Distance 3.5kms (3.5kms total)



The first section follows a couple of footpaths and is pretty much flat.  Aside from a few jokes along the lines of "I hope it’s all as easy as this" and a few people who started a long way back running past, it was pretty uneventful warm up section.  There was a line up for the checkpoint, but with the electronic timing chips, it didn’t take too long to get through.





Section Two – We’re singing in the dew…

Hardys Road to Mt Nimmel Lodge

Distance 9kms (12.5kms total)



Our first taste of off road saw us following a single file track through the forest.  There were a number of hold ups as teams took it slowly at the creek crossing, but on the whole it moved at a reasonable pace.  We were a little concerned about the amount of mud on the trail.  Shane pointed out that it was "probably just the dew" to which Wayne replied, "yes, and look at all that dew flowing down the creek".  After may more dewy puns, the track widened and we hit our first serious undulation … it has to be noted that every says that there a only 4 big hills on the course, so all the rest get lumped under the wonderful term of undulations.  Team Insanity reached the top of the "undulation" without any problems and made up numerous places by not taking a break at the top like a lot of other teams. 



At the bottom of the hill we found checkpoint 2.  We walked in to much cheering wondering why people were so excited that we’d completed two of the easier sections on the track. We meet up with our support crew, had a quick bit to eat, refilled our water bladders and grabbed some food for lunch.





Section Three – It’s just at the top of the hill

Mt Nimmel Lodge to Austinville Road

Distance 9kms (21.5kms total)



Finally we found something we could call a hill.  Sure it’s the smallest of the 4 hills, but it’s pretty steep.  Shane and Brock took the lead on the hill, however for once we took it at a reasonable pace … something about another 80 or so kilometres to go …  At the top we only had to wait about 30 seconds for Wayne and Nicole to join us.  Nicole waved us on and we headed off along the ridge line.  After a while we found the turn off to head down the hill.  Shane attempted to set his hiking poles to downhill mode, but couldn’t get the twist lock to release … Brock stepped up and got it in one go with a look on his face that said "what are you, a girl?" (Shane maintains it was sweaty hands reducing his grip)  With Nicole missing Brock’s look (and thereby missing a chance to put him in his place … or more likely join in the humiliation) we headed down the hill.  The down hill is apparently powdery and slippery in the dry, and muddy and very slippery in the wet.  Luckily it was not too wet and not too dry and not slippery at all (I feel like I should be writing Goldilocks and the 3 bears – except Nicole has red hair and none of us guys are manly homosexuals)

[Nicole: it perhaps helps to mention at this point that I'd made a mention of the guys being too macho about something, and this prompted singing of "we're men, manly men, we're men in ti-i-ights..."]



At the bottom we reached Austinville Road and followed it to the end.  Austinville Road has just been surfaced by the worst roads crew in QLD.  The bitumen is shiny and new, but there are gaps where the dirt shows through and many spots were they did put down enough stone.  Anyway it kept us entertained talking about the crappy workmen ship and how much nicer it would be if it was still a dirt track following the stream. 



Our map and track notes state that the checkpoint was at the end of Austinville Road.  However at the briefing night, they mentioned that due to mobile phone coverage and their funky new electronic timing system, the checkpoint had been moved to the top of the hill.  Since our plan was to have lunch at the checkpoint, we headed on up the hill.  This is the second of the big hills, it’s long and it’s steep, and we hadn’t practiced it.  Nicole put on a brave face as she chatted with some school kids on the way up … apparently it’s very hard to hold a conversation when the heart rate is rising and the lungs are screaming for air.  Fortunately Nicole outlasted the kids, and she was able to resume breathing "normally" after they dropped behind.  At the top of the hill we saw lots of people resting, but we decided to push on to the checkpoint before having a break.  Seeing at it was "just at the top of the hill" we resisted the urge for snacks and plodded on …



Half an hour later we were still plodding and Nicole started to speculate that the checkpoint was probably at the end of the ridge.  It turned out she was right, and that the end of the ridge was still a little way away.  An hour after we’d climbed the hill, Wayne and Shane rounded a corner to see Nicole jumping up and down and Brock grinning like an idiot.  Checkpoint found!  We checked in and rewarded ourselves with lunch.  Nicole happily sent the support crew an sms to let them know we were about half an hour ahead of schedule.



P.S. The distance noted above it probably very wrong, but that’s what was on the map.  It had to be at least 14kms … and the next section was nowhere near 12kms …





Section Four – I want a horsey!

Austinville Road (and then up hill and 5kms along the ridge line) to the Hinze Dam Ridge

Distance 12kms (33.5kms total)



There were a few complains about aches and pains as we got up to head out along section four, but on the hole we were all doing well.  Section four followed the road for a while, and apart from some people driving aimlessly up and down a dead end road, it was pretty uneventful.  The course branched off onto a dirt track and after some time Wayne remembered that the year he did Kokoda previously there was a hidden checkpoint on this section to ensure no one took a short cut to Polly’s Kitchen.  As it turns out the hidden checkpoint has been given full checkpoint status this year.  This check point was manned by the good people of some place I can’t remember Horseback Trail Riding.  As the first to the check point Shane marched up and said "I’d like to hire four horses please".  The response came back, "We’ve been trying to tell you people for years that riding is easier than walking".  Unfortunately no horses where forthcoming, so we walked on…





Section Five – Now that’s a creek crossing!

Hinze Dam Ridge to Polly’s Kitchen

Distance 3kms (36.5kms total)



After a few steepish down hills talk of drug assistance came up to take the edge off the knees.  All thoughts of knees were soon removed as we encountered a creek crossing.  There were a lot of team backed up at the creek attempting to cross the creek by walking across a log.  Brock joined the queue for the log, while Shane, Nicole and Wayne looked for another way across.  One spot was found with a large leap required to get to the other side, but with no run up and unsure footing on the other side, Shane wussed out and joined to line for the log.  Nicole found the quickest way was to just take her shoes off and walk through.  Wayne however took on the challenge and leaped over the creek.  All dry and entertained, we wandered into Polly’s Kitchen to meet up with our support crew for the second time.



Our support crew pampered us this time with coffee and sausages in bread.  Orders were placed for Hungry Jacks and we were on our way. 





Section Six – Hill the third

Polly’s Kitchen to the Environment Centre

Distance 7kms (43.5kms total)



Just next to Polly’s Kitchen is a nice little stream.  It’s very pretty.  It’s even got a nice, albeit ugly, bridge that crosses it … but that would be too easy.  Instead we went under the bridge (being very careful to avoid the trolls) and crossed the creek using a fallen tree and a bunch of stones that just stick out of the water.  To add to the fun, once you get to the other side you’re on the wrong side of the road and have to cross the road via a storm drain.  After surviving that, our reward was a climb up the biggest hill on the course.  Trudge mode was engaged by all and we headed for the top.



Brock and Shane reached the top first and Brock declared that it had only taken 35 mins … beating our previous best of 45mins.  Shane was somewhat sceptical that we could possibly set a record after walking so far.  Nicole arrived shortly after and informed us that it had in fact taken 45mins.  No record but still impressive considering how tired we were.



After a short break we headed down the other side.  As per usual Brock and Nicole disappeared and Shane and Wayne took the knee conservation approach.  It worked … sort of.  Either that, or having someone to complain and sympathise with helped.  But even people in pain can talk about pain so long, and we soon moved onto food.  From Christmas lunches to the best roasts we’d ever cooked.  We decided that we need to get the support crew to get us some roast lamb.  When we informed Nicole she decided we also needed roast potatoes, but unfortunately no one actually rang the support crew, so roast was off the menu.



The sun set just before our first stop at the Environment Centre.  We stopped for a snack and a rest inside the nice warm building.  This seemed like a great idea until we headed back outside to into the cold and dark … and discovered that it was cold and dark.





Section Seven – Welcome the Wall

Environment Centre to Numinbah Hall

Distance 7kms (50.5kms total)



We set off for Numinbah Hall amongst a large group of walkers.  The group behind us had an mp3 player and some tiny speakers that were pumping out songs from Rocky … this lead to many Rocky impersonations and much bad singing.



This was one section we weren’t looking forward to.  It’s long, flat, boring and there are 8 creek crossing (ok Nicole, you win).  This caused a bit of congestion as everyone lined up to take is slowing across the wet muddy stepping stones … everyone except Nicole.  Using pre-planing, she’d changed into some old shoes just for this stage and simply walked straight through the creeks.  On top of the creek crossings, last time we trained on it, it was nothing but mud.  Luckily it had mostly dried up and the mud wasn’t too bad.



At the base of the only hill, sorry undulation, on this section it was clear that Brock was struggling.  After a short rest Brock declared that he just wanted to get to the checkpoint and sit down.  He trudged up the hill like a trouper and all the way to Numinbah Hall.  Fortunately Brock has packed a magic elixir of garlic, toad stools, newt eyes many other foul smelling ingredients.  After adding some noodles, he swallowed it down and improved rapidly.  Jenesse just shook her head saying she almost threw up when she smelt it.



Jenesse lent Shane her super-duper stretchy knee brace thingy … Shane happily accepted this and swapped his cheap knee support to the left knee to make room for the deluxe model.  It also served as a good excuse to postpone the drugs for a while longer.  Half way and no drugs, not bad for someone who struggled through training with knee pain.





Section Eight – Weren’t we just here?

Numinbah Hall to the Environment Centre

Distance 6kms (56.5kms total)



The trek back to the Environment Centre was rather uneventful. One long undulation didn’t seem to worry our practiced legs too much.  Our belly’s full of food, we breezed in and out of the check point very happy to have the pointless loop behind us.





Section Nine – The stage the laughter died

Environment Centre to Black Shoot

Distance 5.5kms (61kms total)



We started this section in good spirits and with Brock and Wayne sporting some very trendy hi-vis jackets.  We walked along the main road and over a bridge.  Luckily there was a car parked at the end of the bridge with a guy who told us where to turn off.  He was replacing a missing sign and we helped him out by putting some markets in the trees along the path.  This path lead us along the edge of the Hinze dam.  With the full moon out it was quiet a nice walk and Shane made good on his promise to teach Nicole the Universe song.  After a recital that may have included some waltzing during the musical interlude, Nicole declared that the song was too hard to learn.  Happy with his recital Shane plodded on.



The fun and games ended rather suddenly after we left the dam and crossed the road onto the new section of the track.  This was referred to at the briefing night as the cow trail and we were told that we’d love it.  Apparently being insane doesn’t mean you’re also sadistic.  This trail sucked.  It was single file, rough, every third or forth rock would move under you feet, we constantly tripped on tree roots and the track spent most of the time leaning about 20 degrees to the right.  Oh, and there were a heap of trees fallen across the track.  All in all it didn’t make for a fun walk, especially for a group of people with sore knees who’d been walking for almost 18 hours.  Some of the cleaner comments include:



Brock: This is just soul destroying

Nicole: It can’t go down and to the right, the checkpoint is on top of the ridge to our left

Wayne: Last time we just got to walk along the road

Shane: If this ends up back at the road, I’m going to kill someone



As it turns out, it didn’t go back to the road … it went to a creek with lots of big wobbly rocks for us to walk on.  The quality trail then continued up another hill.  After much cursing the cow trail finally emerged onto a fire trail which we followed up to the Black Shoot checkpoint.  Big hill number 4: complete.  It took a lot of effort not to blame the people at the checkpoint for the track, but we restrained ourselves to just telling them that it sucked big time.  The other teams at the checkpoint were very quick to agree.  Wayne found out that the main reason for the change was to stop people from walking on a main road for such a long distance.  Apparently the cow trail was the easiest path they could find … I’d hate to see the hard ones. 



I guess the silver lining is we now have a nice new phrase to utter: "At least it’s not as bad as that <insert curse word here> section nine!" (F’ing – with a capital F – seemed very popular)





Section Ten – Mmmmm, caramel cake

Black Shoot to Syd Duncan Park

Distance 4kms (66kms total)



We followed the road along the top of a ridge, and when that ran out we followed a grassy trail.  The views of the Gold Coast were impressive, but other than that it was uneventful.  Just before we got to Syd Duncan Park we detoured through a farm and some houses.  This provided us with lots of sloppy mud to wander through.  Unhappily we trudged through the last of the mud and spied some people sitting out the front of their house with a nice fire.  As we go closer they got up and offered us caramel cake, biscuits and vegemite sandwiches.  The caramel cake easily won and picked up our spirits immensly.  It’s amazing that people would be sitting in the cold at 2am to hand out food to strangers, thank you, whoever you are.



Shortly after that we headed up the hill to Syd Duncan Park.  When we found support crew Nicole was very, er, focused on checking in and cut though any attempts at conversation to find out where the checkpoint was.  Once we were checked in it was business as usual with coffee, milo and food.  Our fun on f’ing section nine ensured that the nurofen was broken out to help with the up coming decent down hellfire pass.  The support crew reminded us that if we walked out of Syd Duncan Park we were almost assured of finishing.  They must have been convincing because we all got up and wandered off into the night.





Section Eleven – Hellfire

Syd Duncan Park to Belliss Road

Distance 7.5kms (73.5kms total)



After leaving Syd Duncan park there was much groaning about sore joints and muscles, but after warming up a bit we picked up speed and settled into our stride.  We ticked off some land marks, nice view of the gold coast to the right, crazy medieval flintstone house on the left, and if you’ll look to your right you’ll see a house that looks like a church.  With the unusual architecture behind us, we came across Hellfire Pass.  We followed the road to the bottom and had a short rest before heading down the dirt track.  While Hellfire is the longest steepest decent the Nurofen was doing it’s job and taking the edge off the worst of the pain.  At the bottom of the hill we found a very cheery mob of people manning the checkpoint.





Section Twelve – The scary mountain

Belliss Road to Beaudesert Road

Distance 5kms (78.5kms total)



Leaving the checkpoint we were reminded to turn right at the bottom of Belliss Road.  Apparently another team had turned left and were found many kilometres away wondering were Mt Nathan was. 



Ah Mt Nathan, how I loathed thee. By Kokoda standards it doesn’t even rate as a hill (bloody undulations), but in practice I was tired and needed several rest breaks to make the top, and with a sore knee the decent was worse.  It’s a very eroded track with lots of little gullies running down it, so it requires a bit of thinking to work out the best way up … exactly what we were ready for at 4am.  Brock, Nicole and Wayne headed up the hill while Shane removed his jumper in preparation for the perspiration.  While slowly packing away his jumper (everything was happening slowly at this stage) several teams passed Shane.  The rest break must of helped, because Shane’s slow plodding was faster than the others slow plodding and Shane passed the other teams and caught the rest of Team Insanity at the top of the mountain.  However the ascent had taken it’s toll and Shane was regretting the banana he’d scoffed down at the last checkpoint.  As walking it off was the only option, the team headed down the hill.



After wandering through some cow paddocks we came to the road that would lead us to the checkpoint.  You think that a nice flat road would be welcome, but after 80 odd kilometres it just reminds you how sore your feet are, and how much harder a road is.  Add to that an annoying down hill slop and it just gets better.  The final cherry on the cake were a couple of signs telling us when we were 2kms and 1km from the checkpoint.  These were close to two of the longest kilometres in the event.  Went we finally reached the checkpoint we were told that our support crews were 800 metres up the road.  We left grumbling about how far away the support crews were.  When we stopped complaining we released the teams either side of us were complaining about exactly the same thing.



We found Matt waiting for us on the side of the road looking very happy to see us.  I’m not sure if we returned the favour, but we were more than happy to follow him to the rest of the support crew and our chairs.  With the final change of socks Shane discovered that it was cold enough for his socks to create steam when he took them out of his boots.  Brock declined a change of socks revealing that one of his blisters had burst and he didn’t want to make it worse.





Section Thirteen – The beginning of the end

Beaudesert Road to Nerang State Forest

Distance 7.1kms (85.6kms total)



As we got up to leave our support crew for the final time we were approached by another competitor to see if he could join us.  It turned out that two of his team mates had decided to pull out at the last major checkpoint.  We happily let him join us and we headed into Nerang forest as a team of 5.  The extra person gave our conversation a lift and helped raise our spirits.  Another big help was the sun coming up.  There seemed to be a lot more undulations than we remembered from training before the last big … undulation and the checkpoint.  But we got there.





Section Fourteen – I just want it to end

Nerang State Forest to the Finish Line

Distance 10.4kms (96kms total)



10.4kms shouldn’t seem like much after what we’d already done.  It was even much flatter than a lot of the course.  But it was the longest 10kms of the event.  Our tolerance for our niggling injuries was almost at an end.  Some injuries were progressing past the niggling stage and the nurofen from the last major checkpoint was losing it’s effect.  Nicole was struggling on the up hills with a leg that didn’t want to bend and resorting to a duck waddle on the down hills and flats.  Wayne was struggling with his knees on the downhills.  Brock broke another blister and was trying to find a way to walk that wouldn’t make it hurt.  The general consensus was that we just wanted it to end.  Then we saw one of those bloody signs saying only 4kms to go.  Another hour before it was all over.  We plodded on.  After what seems like forever we saw another distance sign … 2kms to go, thank god it didn’t say 3kms.  We kept walking and kept coming to little rises in the track, surely one of them had to be the last one before the downhill to the finish.  We also started to wonder were the 1km sign was … we never found it.  The count down they’d mentioned in the briefing was missing.  We finally found the final downhill.  We’d obviously practised this too much as Nicole insisted we turn right to head to the car instead of heading to the finish line.  We pointed out we need to go straight and headed down the hill.



We rounded the final bend and saw people on the road directing teams across the road to the finish.  After climbing over the ridiculously high access point in the fence we headed for the finish together.  We were so happy to finish we didn’t even notice our support crew cheering us on (sorry guys).  We’d done it, the stupid, the crazy, the insane, the Kokoda Challenge.





Section No More



In the final wash up, we walked 96kms in 26 hours and 33 minutes and were the 16th complete mixed team to reach the finish line.  We’d started off aiming for 24 hours, but at the end we were just happy to finish.



Wayne dropped one final surprise on us by telling us that the only training he’d done was the three session he’d had with the rest of the team.  I don’t know how he did it on such a limited preparation, but that’s an amazing effort.



All that remains now is to toast the support crew for their hard work and celebrate our achievement.

Continue reading Team Insanity’s Kokoda Challenge