"It’s all good, it won’t rain at KP", the Grasshopper ensures the crew. "The BOM radar shows rain in the north and drizzle in the far west ranges. CLIMB ON."

Indeed, despite the gloomy sky, the weather seemed to hold off at KP. By 5.30pm the Teacher was setting up top rope over Chubba Chip Mods and Gilligan was deciding to lead either Juice or Vegemite. He chose Juice so the Giggler and the Chock could improve on their past performance on this climb.

The Giggler belayed Gilligan as he lead the route. He easily cleaned the climb to set up a top rope.

Meanwhile, the Chad and Rudy popped in at the cliffs to pick up a DVD and his harness. The Chad was still sufferring the ill effects of alchohol poisoning from the weekend. Later that night, Rudy had to pamper the Chad while he watched Dean Potter solo up El Capitan in the Masters of Stone V.

The Teacher saw the start of CCM and knew it was going to be tricky. The wall is slightly overhung with awkward holds on an otherwise smooth face. An obvious ledge must be reached and then mantled to finally have a moment of rest before a smooth arete is negotiated. The crux is next: a high mantle that offers only slopers for hand holds. After this its easy climbing to a crack line running up the headwall.

Holding on, the Teacher peered up towards the ledge. "I can’t let go to reach that hold or I’m going to fall off", the Teacher thought. "Pull in the slack tight", the Teacher said. The Chock started pulling in the rope through the belay device. The Teacher peeled off and the stretch in the rope was enough for him to bounce off the ground with his legs. The Chock was dragged a few steps towards the cliff.

A few people watching offered some beta: "Use the undercling" was the common tip. The Teacher stood staring at the rock, studying every rough edge that was available. This trance like state lasted for about 10 minutes, before he approached the rock again.

The Teacher took the advice and held on to the rock using the undercling.

"Yeah. Thats the way.", encourages Gilligan.

Not wanting to sound like a bunch of holy christian climbers, the Grasshopper heckles the Teacher, "Your going to come off!"

This was the "encouragement" the Teacher needed. He lunged towards to the ledge and was able to stick to it. The second hand came up to offer more support. A bit of a scramble with his legs gave him more height. But now the Teacher was in his usual Fazspastics contortionist routine. One leg was on the mantle. A hand placed palm down on the ledge and the other two limbs dangling in the air. All while his body is near horizontal. The laws of physics were broken tonight. Henceforth, this defiance of gravity shall be called the Art of Fazitation (ala levitation). To use in a sentence, "The Teacher approached the crux, and Fazitated pass the mantle". Kids don’t attempt Fazitation on your own. Crab walking up a cliff is more dangerous than soloing. Even the Teacher lost control of his Hero like abilities…

Without realising how fast the Teacher was Fazitating, his flabby arm parts got caught in the anchor as the Chock was desperately trying to keep up with the belaying. "Argh Fawwk! Gimme some slack.", the Teacher yelled. The Chock fed some rope back out. "More! More! Argh Fawwk". The Chock then quickly let the Teacher down. Giving far more slack than the Teacher really wanted. "Argh Fawwk. Slow down. Slow down", the Teacher yelled with a hint of panic in his voice. The Chock slowed the descent and the Teacher touched down softly to the ground.

The Gilligan gave CCM a go. His go-go gadget arms helped him overcome the hard start. But it was still hard going for him. Gilligan even went to the next climb, Cross With No Name (22) and with some determination cleaned this climb too.

The Giggler who had belayed Gilligan lead Juice, remembered the route taken, in particular the crack start. As always in any sport, watching is easier than actually doing it. The Giggler was in form tonight, providing much material for tonights blog and spraying profanities out. Though not as bad as the natives nearby who swore, punched and chased someone across the park. During some of the hard moves (actually the moves really just required walking across a ledge or stepping up on a block), the Giggler started talking in the third person, "Nicole is not going to fall.", she repeated this to herself. "Nicole doesn’t like ledges". Throw in a few giggles too and she managed to talk herself across and to a section of wall with medium size holds.

The Chock had a good go on Juice’s start. The layback technique was taught to him to move up the crack line. However, the arms were too spent and the Chock decided to traverse around to the right.

Meanwhile, the Giggler got a strange tingling feeling in her bung knee. She told us rain was coming. Indeed, within moments, the first few drops of rain fell. Not quite enough to stop climbing but still for those watching to seek shelter. Henceforth, a webcam will be pointed at the Giggler’s knee cap and streamed across the internet. No longer shall the Grasshopper rely on BOM for forecasts or even radar images. Here is the Knee barometer reading for reference:

• Pale white: Overcast.
• Tan: Fine and sunny.
  
• Red: High UV and hot.
  
• Twitching knee cap: Inclement weather.
• Looks bruised (apparently a common mishap the Giggler suffers): Thunderstorms.

http://kneebarometer.com/ (park it now – it will be a gold mine).